Bright Baby Blues

"I'm sitting down by the highway...Down by that highway side...Everybody's going somewhere...Riding just as fast as they can ride"

Those are the opening lines to one of my favorite songs by Jackson Browne, Your Bright Baby Blues, from the album, The Pretender released in 1976. Last night I went to see Jackson Browne perform with one of my oldest and dearest friends.

The performance was outdoors. The night was beautiful, warm and clear, and our seats were good ones. We'd had some wine and were feeling mellow and talkative. Our conversation was deeply personal as it usually is when we get together. We've been together as friends a long, long time.

Midway through the show I hear the first chords of the intro to this song that I like so much. I know it well. I turn to her and tell her it's my favorite. She knows this already and she knows why as I've told her before. Her hand goes to my arm and squeezes. She knows.

The song is part of my past and it connects me in a very nostalgic way to someone I used to know. Someone I used to love. Memory fades detail, time fades emotion but it's the prevailing reminiscence that still touches me pleasantly. I can close my eyes and hear him sing it to me:

...Baby if you can see me...Out across this wilderness...There's just one thing...I was hoping you might guess...Baby you can free me...All in the power of your sweet tenderness...

I don't make it a habit of looking back at the past, in fact I really never do. I certainly do not look back to that particular time and person. The past is behind me where it belongs, where it shall remain. My present is what I'm interested in, what I hold dear and those with me in it are who I care about. Still...that song makes my mind wander and drift. It drifted last night.

I can see it in your eyes....you've got those bright baby blues...You don't see what you've got to gain...But you don't like to lose...

My mind may have drifted but it didn't drift to what I had then, it drifted to what I have now. It didn't drift to what I was then, but to what I am now. It didn't drift to where I was then, but to where I am now. Right now.

My friend knew I wasn't thinking about the past. Her hand on my arm told me she's not looking back either. The song doesn't tell a story of my past, but of my future. It tells the story of what's ahead for me...or rather what I want for myself.

Like the songs says....I can't help feeling I'm just a day away...From where I want to be.

Where I want to be.

Indeed