Saturday, November 22, 2008

If The Shoe Fits...




If the shoe fits, wear it.

Who has not heard that idiomatic proverb? I first heard it as a girl told to me by my mother countless times. My mother's way of making sure I held myself accountable for thought as well as deed I suppose. If a proverbial shoe fit...I did indeed wear it. I wanted to be accountable, wanted to take to heart the things I did, felt.

Of course if just about any shoe fit me....I would wear it. Shoes...I love shoes. I love how certain pairs of shoes make me feel when I wear them. I will buy a pair of shoes and put together an outfit around them. I love shoes but I digress.

So as not to appear shallow...I must say it is not this particular kind of shoe I refer now. Not the pretty and sexy shoes I often try on and buy. It is the shoe that many who struggle wish we would all try on. Try on for size.

I'm talking about walking a mile in someone else's shoes. We often look at others, size up their lives and make a judgement. I wonder what the judgement would be having stepped into their shoes for a while, walked their paces, felt the pinch from a long day on their feet? We see a seemingly attractive person with a nice house, nice car, nice spouse, nice kids and we think...what a nice life they must have. We might even feel a little jealous, a little envious, wishing such niceties for ourselves. We would be making an egregious error in assuming that the nice we see equates to the nice they live. Those shoes might very well cause blisters, aching blisters they endure day in and day out.

So before you judge, make an assumption...try on those shoes. Try those shoes on and see if they fit. If they fit take a walk in them and find out what it feels like to wear them

What it feels like to wear them in their life...blisters and all.

Indeed.

2 comments:

Alex said...

If the cap fits wear it.

At least that was how it was in my neck of the woods. Strange how common phrases differ from one shire to another. If the judgement is just, then own it, and own up.

I think promotion or demotion are great opportunities to walk in another's shoes. We are given a chance to see what the bosses job is like, or what it's like to be unemployed. Riding shotgun will give you an good insight too.

Truly you cannot judge a book by it's proverbial, but you must walk a mile and observe the details. Of course, like a cloud chamber we cannot observe without interfering with what we wish to observe. I think that was Heisenberg's point.

A good biographer will walk that mile for you. Michael Frayn in "Copenhagen" did just that, taking three people who basically decided the fate of the world in one weekend. Since no one knows the truth of that weekend, then Frayn takes three or four possible interpretations of what may have been. The only truth we know is that Germany was beaten to the atomic age by America.

But closer to your original point. When one is envious it is only towards the good. Nobody wants the big house and beautiful wife and the heating bill and her infidelity, we want the big house, paid for out of some trust fund and her to hang on our every word or movement. We all know the reality in our inner heart, the one rich in paranoia. (or is that just me).

Anonymous said...

As usual, very well said....my statement is "No one knows what goes on behind closed doors". That one statement has helped me throughout life to not judge people.