This week the news cycle was full of stories about a Connecticut woman, Sandra Herold, and her chimp, Travis. Travis nearly fatally mauled Ms Herold's good friend. The police eventually had to shoot Travis, killing him. Ms. Herold made a comment following Travis's death. I can't seem to get it off my mind. She said...He was my everything....
Her everything.
The simple fact that her "everything" was a chimpanzee notwithstanding, I thought about her life. A life such that she made her "everything" hinge on one single individual, albeit a chimp, but one single individual nonetheless.
Can a person really be everything in life?
I wondered if one person could so greatly impact me that I would make that complete and total emotional investment. I wondered if one person, at the exclusion of all others, could mean so much that they would in fact be my everything. I wondered, when all was said and done, if it was reasonable, I wondered if it was prudent and I wondered if it was perhaps essential.
Perhaps having someone be my everything meant that this is the one person who understood me, loved me, accepted me and delighted in me. Perhaps this person would impact me so deeply that for all time I would be changed. Perhaps I would be better for having known them, wiser for having allowed them access in so complete a manner and stronger for having such a combined force at my side.
Perhaps having one person be my everything is truly the secret to having it all.
I still think it was a shame Ms Herold looked to Travis to be her everything. She deserved more in this life than a chimpanzee.
She deserved everything. As do I. As do we all.
Indeed.
Her everything.
The simple fact that her "everything" was a chimpanzee notwithstanding, I thought about her life. A life such that she made her "everything" hinge on one single individual, albeit a chimp, but one single individual nonetheless.
Can a person really be everything in life?
I wondered if one person could so greatly impact me that I would make that complete and total emotional investment. I wondered if one person, at the exclusion of all others, could mean so much that they would in fact be my everything. I wondered, when all was said and done, if it was reasonable, I wondered if it was prudent and I wondered if it was perhaps essential.
Perhaps having someone be my everything meant that this is the one person who understood me, loved me, accepted me and delighted in me. Perhaps this person would impact me so deeply that for all time I would be changed. Perhaps I would be better for having known them, wiser for having allowed them access in so complete a manner and stronger for having such a combined force at my side.
Perhaps having one person be my everything is truly the secret to having it all.
I still think it was a shame Ms Herold looked to Travis to be her everything. She deserved more in this life than a chimpanzee.
She deserved everything. As do I. As do we all.
Indeed.
3 comments:
Perhaps having someone be my everything meant that this is the one person who understood me, loved me, accepted me and delighted in me. Perhaps this person would impact me so deeply that for all time I would be changed.
That's backwards. If someone is your everything, they are the on you love, feel you understand, you accept and delight in them. Your everything is the thing you rely on. Your everything is what you need all in one stop. The Walmart of love.
To have one person be your everything is a romantic ideal, and foolhardy. Any control system needs feedback, and back ups. Space vehicles have circuits in triplicate, if one fails to report, it is disregarded as bad data, and the whole system continues to run.
In life having your life partner, parents, children, friends and siblings provide your whole system. Each brings their own weight and import to your life. You should not rely on any one, but rely on the whole. A gear wheel may fail if one tooth is broken, but a person who loses one of their loved ones will only falter.
The only person who should be your everything is you. You are what maintains friendships and family, if you fail in being you, your support system fails.
Living life is not about playing it safe. I go through it without a net. That's the only way for me.
It is sad to me that this woman put all her emotional energy into a chimpanzee. But I can recall saying those exact words one day many years ago about a young man. And though he was my everything, I still survived his death. Never to be the same...but having learned invaluable lessons about life from the experience. I would do everything exactly the same if I had it to do over.
If I ever found another man who had the qualities to be my everything...I would be at his side as soon as I could get there.
Having read your Blog as well as the 2 comments I have to agree with all of them in many ways.. i would guess it is scary to place your total faith in just one person. Moon points that out very well. Alex makes some good points as well. But I agree with you as well. We have to have somebody to lean on in our life's. Someone we can trust. Someone who can help pick ourselves back up again and get us back on track.. I have 2 very special people in my world that help me each day. I bounce ideas off them. Listen to their words and take it in. They do the same with me and it has worked very well.. The lose of anyone of them would be tough to get around and I dont want to even think about that happening.
Tough topic I guess.. Is there a easy answer to it ???
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